Key events
Group C provided exactly zero goals yesterday: England 0-0 Slovenia, Denmark 0-0 Serbia. The Group of Sleep or perhaps The Group of Binary after providing scorelines of either 1-0, 0-0 or 1-1 in all six matches. But rather than spot numerical patterns, maybe there’s something more significant at play here. On that very subject, we have an email.
Ian Clover writes: “Here’s my attempt to be positive: look at the other results in the England group. None of Denmark, Serbia or Slovenia ever really ‘went for it’. It was a dull, cagey, tight group, and the only team to emerge with a win was England. Put them against a team willing to come out and play against us and we’ll click soon enough.”
A Jude Bellingham email following another subdued performance from England’s great hope against Slovenia.
Shaun Wilkinson says: “I feel like all the talk of TAA/Gallagher/which midfielder should be where is burying the lead of how truly awful Jude Bellingham has been in the last two games. Is Southgate scared of substituting him? It seems certain star players are immune from being dropped or substituted in this day and age (see Mbappe against Poland also), but I feel like his attitude in the last couple of games has really hindered the players around him. I never expected to be saying this as I fully expected him to be brilliant in this tournament, but I think I would leave him out of the next game, put Foden in his preferred role in the middle and bring in Gordon on the left. Am I overreacting?”
Not really Shaun. Something definitely isn’t quite right, I agree. You can tell in Bellingham’s passing. Much of it has this sort of strange high follow through which seems to send a petulant message of ‘I’ll just have to go with this then as none of you are running into space’. Prime Jude fizzes the ball off crisply and then immediately darts into space rather than passes slowly and stands still.
Staying with that Group D game, Poland manager Michal Probierz gave short shrift to those critical of Robert Lewandowski’s jerky, stop-start penalty technique.
It doesn’t matter how he scores them. You cannot tell a player who has scored [more than] 600 goals how to score goals.
Full quotes on that match here, including this piece of wisdom from French boss Didier Deschamps. “You cannot always read a competition just from the group stage.” Take note England fans.
Two iconic forwards were on the scoresheet in France’s 1-1 draw with Poland. Kylian Mbappé tucked away his spot-kick with grace and aplomb but Robert Lewandowski made Jack Douglas look fluid before finally netting his re-taken penalty. Here’s Ben Fisher’s report.
And what a turnaround it would be for Ralf Rangnick if Austria went on to crack open the victory champagne. More ‘Neck it Ralph!’ than ‘Wreck it Ralph’. The Austrian boss, who was much derided for his temporary spell in charge at Manchester United, praised his team for their “courageous and energetic” performance against the Netherlands.
World Cups are a closed shop. The biggest nations always triumph. But it’s different in the Euros as shown by unlikely winners such as Denmark (1992) and Greece (2004). So how about Austria pulling off a shock in 2024? They’ve been a breath of fresh air so far and by topping a group featuring France and the Netherlands, they’ve played themselves onto the easier side of the draw (an Austria v England semi-final is possible).
Here’s the match report from their highly-entertaining 3-2 win over the Dutch yesterday.
The lopsided draw explains away the general bafflement about why England are favourites with the bookies. There are better teams on what we’ve seen so far but the odds on England’s main rivals are kept higher due to their more complicated paths to the final. England’s are artificially lower as they avoid most of the big guns and have less to beat.
Euro 2024 odds: 4/1 England, 9/2 Germany, Spain, 5/1 France, 6/1 Portugal, 14/1 Netherlands, 18/1 Belgium, Italy, 25/1 Austria, 40/1 Switzerland, 66/1 Denmark. The rest 100/1 or more.
And what’s that saying about it being better to be a lucky general than a good one? It’s fair to say that England have had some favourable draws throughout tournaments under Gareth Southgate and this one could be the best of the lot. Check your official Euro 2024 bracket and you’ll notice that the top half of the draw is loaded: Spain v Germany and Portugal v France would be the two quarter-finals if it goes to form. England avoid all of that, their only known bottom half foes just a bunch of ski nations: Austria, Switzerland and Italy. Belgium and the Netherlands look set to join them but a pair of past-their-best Low Countries shouldn’t strike any fear into England either. It’s on!
The positive take on England isn’t too far-fetched. This is tournament football. Grinding out results at this stage really isn’t too bad. Portugal drew all three group games when hoisting the silverware in Euro 2016 and their only win in regulation time throughout the whole tournament was a 2-0 success against Wales in the semis. It’s not pretty; let me rephrase that: it’s dull as dishwater. But… England have conceded just a single goal and won the group. Let’s stare at it for a while to soak in that meat and two veg points tally and goal difference.
Gareth Southgate had his diplomacy stretched last night, opting to go with England’s fans creating an ‘unusual environment’ after some lobbed plastic beer cups at him as he went over to applaud following the 0-0 draw. Rather appropriately, none hit the target.
I understand the narrative towards me. That’s better for the team than it being towards them but it is creating an unusual environment to operate in. I’ve not seen any other team qualify and receive similar.
What did the England fans make of it in Cologne last night? Microphone in hand, our roving reporter Paul MacIness got in among them.
A withering assessment of Conor Gallagher’s 45-minute performance last night, courtesy of Barney Ronay. It’s hard to disagree.
Gallagher produced one of the most edgy, weird, fretful performances you’re likely to see at this level. It took him 10 minutes 48 seconds to touch the ball. Here is a list of things he did before he touched the ball. He fouled someone. He fell over. He stood in a strange non‑position. By the end of his 45 minutes he had one clearance, two fouls, 13 passes, all of them short and basically just a nervous tic, shuttling the ball away. Gallagher is a muscular runner. But he is basically someone football happens to.
At least England are providing plenty of scope to riff out prog rock/jazz names. Adding to the ‘Trent Alexander Experiment’, we now have the ‘Harry Kane Paradox’. Catch them on Jools Holland soon.
He is of course too good a passer simply to leave him up top and feed off scraps like a cockney Haaland. He is too good a poacher to play as a pure No 10. But he is not currently sharp enough to play both roles in the same phase of play.
How about some England player ratings? These from Jacob Steinberg, who awards four 7s – two being given to substitutes. You can probably guess who got the 4. #failedexperiment
Let’s start with the basics. Here’s David Hytner’s match report from Cologne.
Southgate’s team stabilised and Mainoo’s composure was a part of it.
Preamble
Great news. England have topped their group at Euro 2024. That’s more than France could manage. And hosts Germany only topped theirs thanks to a goal in injury-time.
And yet such basic analysis just won’t do as teeth continue to gnash over England’s latest limp performance: a 0-0 draw with Slovenia.
We’ll have all the reaction from Cologne where there was some genuine joy and celebration although that came from Slovenia, whose third straight draw was enough for them to reach the last 16.
Plus, are Austria bona fide dark horses?